Play the lottery. I don’t know anything about the people who won big lotteries. Maybe it was me.

My parents chose each other. My mother chose my father to get away from her mother.

My father is an only child who isn’t used to not getting his own way. If you had asked me 30 years ago, I would have said she’d eventually divorce him or murder him.

For a long time, he’d leave her alone so he could go out and ride his motorcycle, and she was miserable because she was stuck at home alone.

Now he’s too old to ride so he’s home all the time. He’s definitely crossed into “elderly”, and he’s having serious health issues. He’s depressed because he thought he’d be young forever, and he can’t accept the reality. He won’t do anything to improve his situation. He just sits around saying he’d rather be dead. So now my mom is miserable because she’s stuck at home with him.

Despite all that and the hostility they’ve expressed to each other over the years, I’d say they are perfect for each other.

Well, the context I was thinking was routine travel.

If I had plans with a friend, and they had something big to tell me, I’d be ok with them saying we needed to talk when I got there.

I’m thinking more along the lines of:

It’s Wednesday, I’m at work, and my wife calls me in the middle of the day to tell me we have to talk when I get home.

Or conversely, I’m at home, and my boss calls me to say I should come to his office so we can talk when I get in.

“Promise me you won’t be upset.”

I am not promising shit until you tell me what we’re talking about. In fact, you just got me upset.

However, “don’t panic” wouldn’t get a better reaction from me. If you want me to not panic, tell me you’ve already dealt with it and there’s nothing for me to do, or at the very least describe your plan. I’ll decide whether panic is warranted after I hear your solution.

Another bad one:

“We need to talk when you get here.”

If we’re not going to talk about it now, why not wait to bring it up until I’m there?

“I was lucky and my brain chemistry corrected itself, so all you need to do is stop being unlucky and be lucky like me!”

While we’re at it, if you can’t reach the top shelf, just grow taller. That’s what I did.

I skimmed through the Romance genre in my media server. Here’s what I came up with. Not sure if any of these would work.

WALL-E

Dracula (1992)

Starman. He’s not human, but don’t hold that against him.

Warm Bodies, if you don’t mind a zombie theme

Return to Me. A wife has to die, but there’s a nice romance once she’s out of the way.

On Golden Pond. There’s a romance in there, but it isn’t the main part of the story. And they’re elderly.

The Man with Two Brains. True, she’s just a brain in a jar, but none of us is perfect.

Love Story, just don’t believe it when she says love means never having to say you’re sorry.

Little Manhattan, but the romance is on the other end of the age spectrum from On Golden Pond

The Fault in Our Stars

I had a professor in college that said when an AI problem is solved, it is no longer AI.

Computers do all sorts of things today that 30 years ago were the stuff of science fiction. Back then many of those things were considered to be in the realm of AI. Now they’re just tools we use without thinking about them.

I’m sitting here using gesture typing on my phone to enter these words. The computer is analyzing my motions and predicting what words I want to type based on a statistical likelihood of what comes next from the group of possible words that my gesture could be. This would have been the realm of AI once, but now it’s just the keyboard app on my phone.